Personal Factoid: Papa John's Pizza has been banned from your Unhumble Car Czar's humble undisclosed location because of rude, pushy, door-to-door solicitors who purport to rep coupon books for The Papa. The kind who interrupt dinner and stand at your doorstep brazenly running the "Yes" routine misappropriated from some Dale Carnegie course.
Do you like pizza?
Do you like saving money on pizza?
Do you feel like a moron yet for not slamming the door in my face earlier?
But give Papa props for his summer campaign to locate and repurchase his long-lost 1971-1/2 Camaro Z/28, sold to float his fledgling restaurant interests in 1983 and repackaged in 2009 as the heart and soul of the nation's third largest pizza chain.
A replica of this gold-with-black-stripes Z/28 has been making its rounds on Papa John's commercials, looking like nothing more than an eccentric affectation of a pizza baron who actually holds a driver's license. Kind of like those weird local car dealer and rug store commercials that never went through an agency ... on a national scale.
But now that the back story is out (a quarter mil finder's fee fueled by pure chest-thumping American muscle car passion) and The Papa is giving out free pizzas to everyone who rolls up to a Papa John's store in a Camaro tonight, I your Unhumble Car Czar, by the powers vested in me by myself as President Obama's self-appointed national Car Czar, hereby declare John H. Schnatter, Louisville, Kentucky, a.k.a. "Papa John," The Order of the Stand-up Car Guy.
That's unless this whole promotion turns out to be some sly cross-marketing deal with GM to tie-in with its newest and much-hyped punchy pony, in which case The Order shall return to its previous co-holders, Jon Bon Jovi and Sean Penn.
Way to go, Papa.
Muscle Car Nation owes you a few smoky-burnout salutes tonight.